Why Christianity "Works", sort of, or at least should...

Jesus apparently said he came for the sick, not the "well" - its only the broken who need mending, the lost that must be found.

So many people at some stage in their life journey, come to the point where they can't find the inner self, the peace, strength, love, joy, to carry on. They discover they are broken and have no way of fixing themselves.

Jesus provides an external reference - a relational, personally identifiable representation of all that is lacking in themselves, and so much more. He is everything we could want to be, all we aspire to.

He provides support and boundaries, love and a sense of "it will all work out ok".

We all need this at some point, and Christianity, in its purest form, meets this need. When we look at the broken (myself included) who have benefited the most from this religion, its simply because they have bypassed the doctrines and theologies of the church, and rested in God's love, stripped of performance, guilt and shame.

But its still part of the journey. Many just rest in this place, and that's ok, but its still the very beginning of the journey. The simplicity and depth of that unconditional love starts to open us up, free from the confines of biblical traditions and religious bondage and manipulation, free to explore the depths of who we are and who God is. He has given us the steps to growth, and the minds and hearts to explore everything that we can conceive.

Nothing can separate us from God because we are part of him and he is part of us. He is intrinsically part of all matter and energy, the source behind and in all that exists. We cannot be "separated" because its physically impossible.

In that simple and secure knowledge we can open our hearts and minds to explore, to look for him in everything - in every way - in whatever manner we choose. Our foundation is secure. When we rest in the unity/union of all things, there is only love - which is the energy that binds everything together.

When we live loved, we can do no wrong, we are no longer part of the "tree of the knowledge of good and evil" - we are simply love.

So pure Christianity - the basic concept that Jesus is someone far greater than us who can override our hurt and pain, our '"sin" and evil - works because it provides the first step in healing and wholeness. When the religion is removed from Jesus (the traditions, conflicting doctrines, dogmas, bigotry, bibliolatry etc), we see a brother who leads us into a path of self discovery, to show us that "we are one, just as he and the father are one" - one of the most extraordinary statements he made. He, and God, and us, are one. Not similar, not greater or lesser, ONE.

Christianity should be leading us to much higher/deeper/broader places. Places of fearless exploration, recognising God in everything and everyone, cutting through thick layers of paradigms to reveal pure, unconditional love.

Doctrines don't matter. Was he God incarnate? Born of a virgin? Died for sin in our place? Resurrected from the dead? Who knows!! And really, if we make these doctrines the "make or break" for our eternal security, we have completely and utterly missed the point. You can believe them if you want, if they help you find the peace and security you need to grow. But they are a simple starting point, and just one option on the way.

God is so much bigger, so much better, so much more than any one religion can contain.

Live loved!

Gay in your face

Most of my friends accept my views on being gay, and those who don't seem to have just disappeared.

Thanks so much to all of you who relate, support, encourage, or even just attempt to understand in the spirit of love we are all part of.
But here's the next challenge:
What if I found a partner? What if I posted romantic pictures? How would you feel if I came round for dinner with a guy?

What I'm trying to say is its great to give verbal support, but when it becomes very "in your face", how does that make you feel? Would you be embarrassed? Feel awkward? Not know what to say?
Believe me, I know that feeling!

But that's where the rubber hits the road. I'm not condemning anyone or guilt tripping you, just the simple fact that at some point, if you are straight and support equal rights in every way for LGBT people, you will eventually actually meet these people (maybe friends who have come out) and have to relate one to one, personally.

I don't know how difficult it would be for many of my friends if I turned up on the doorstep with a "boyfriend", but it could happen.
How would you feel if it was one of your close friends? What if one of your friends said they wanted a gender reassignment (sex change)?

It pays to remember that the latest statistics say that at least 10% of the population is LGBT, and some studies claim up to 15% and more. The only thing that has changed is the silence. It won't go away, no matter how much scripture we throw around, no matter how dogmatic and moralistic we get, no matter what we think the bible says or how God feels about it all, the reality is staring us in the face - There are millions of LGBT people, and they cannot change, no matter what religion says - nor do they need to change!

Live loved.

I'm a snob

Interesting thoughts that I'm not sure how to present without sounding horribly pretentious and basically up myself. Its very self disclosing and something I'm still processing, even after all these years. Never the less, here it is.

I live and associate within a certain class of peers, those that I perceive as my equals in terms of intelligence, integrity, passions and beliefs.

We all do that, its just what we do as humans. But here's where I simply don't know what to do. In reality, there are "unintelligent" people - those who either don't, won't or can't extend their mental faculties to rational thinking. That's not to say we don't all have our moments (and very big moments) of irrationality and complete idiocy, but there are those who simply seem to lack the ability to be self observant. They can't (to varying degrees) step "outside" their thought processes enough to build real depth of relationship, compassion, empathy and understanding.

On the one level you have the "redneck" mentality that reeks of unbridled bigotry and ignorance at its best. Then you have those who use things like religion to hide behind, and express their opinions and observations in the name of that religion, all with a similar ignorance that is in the category of "don't won't or can't" think for themselves with any level of integrity. Politics is another haven for the ignorant to hide behind.

I would like to assume I'm intelligent, in that I'm capably of thinking reasonably rationally, own my thoughts, have integrity, compassion and the ability and desire to want to understand others. There are many others who I consider far more intelligent in those terms than myself, but I still have a tendency to group myself with the more elite "thinkers" - those who take the time to ponder deeper things, to question, to see beyond the surface images, to challenge the status quo.

I struggle to simply accept that much of the world doesn't have the same abilities. I can't help but be a snob in some ways, because I really do see things differently and take the time to question myself and all around me.

But at the same time I really do have a love and compassion for everyone (mostly, lol), seeing them as struggling with the same things I do, the same life problems. We are all equal, under the same rain that falls on the just and the unjust.

I feel really frustrated that so many people don't seem to understand the most basic concepts of living - relationships, empathy, even common sense. So does this make me better, smarter, blessed or cursed?

I know there are many who feel the same, and many who think they are the same but simply parrot things that sound intelligent (that could be me half the time!). Some times I give up trying to communicate because of the apparent inability of the other to be objective and rational enough.

There are however, very "simple" people, who have an incredible sincerity and integrity, accept their own limitations and extend so much love and compassion that its embarrassing to the rest of us, wherever we are at! But I'm not like that.

I'm not like a redneck. I'm not a mindless consumer. I'm not a sheep. I'm a rebellious thinker. And often it feels like a curse, when it makes me proud and look down on others, and other times a burden of responsibility. Sometimes it would be good to not have to think, but its just who I am. Can't change it - can't stop thinking, observing, pondering.

And worst of all, it feels incredibly arrogant, demeaning and patronising to even express these thoughts! But there it is, now you know!!

To love, or not to love?

That is the question - sort of. Well, not THE question, but an important question depending on the context and what you had for dinner.

With the amazing revelations in recent years concerning God's grace and love, there has been renewed hope for the reconciliation of the church or "body of christ" into the ever elusive unity that the bible states is the one thing that sets us apart - and the one thing that the church, despite 2000 years of trying, has never achieved on any level.

This really sucks, and I'm quite amazed that we have kept on trying for so long, although only halfheartedly, and generally deciding that its only worth bothering to inflict unity through control.

We have had a lousy track record. And it aint getting any better.

So what's wrong with this picture? Insanity has been described as doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. Hmm, guess the church is officially insane, and there is probably more truth to that than I would go into in this particular blog.

Again, it could be something to do with my famous slogan, that is probably sending everyone crazy - yes - paradigms!!

We keep thinking that everyone believing correct doctrines is the bottom line, and that as we accept (read tolerate) those who differ, we can slowly bring them around to these correct doctrines. But if love is the bottom line, which scripture does seem to indicate, then we have a serious problem at the most basic level. Besides what is correct doctrine?

So...

What if our whole concept of church is wrong? What if the horse we are flogging died about 1900 years ago, and is so dead it doesn't even smell anymore - its just a mummified body that's been mutilated beyond recognition?

Perhaps the whole purpose of this recent revelation of grace is to show us that dead horse so we can bury it. But what does that leave us with? First it means that trying to sort out doctrine will never work. But there is so much adherence to doctrine that its like flogging a dead horse (yes I know...) trying to get past it.

To make matters worse, if you try to make love the central issue you have to confront the reality of the dead doctrines and the damage they do. The fruit of doctrines (all doctrines really) may look good to those who benefit from them, but what is the real fruit. You see, the fruit is the defining point, the thing that says love or not love.

When we look at the fruit of every doctrine of the last 2000 years, can we see good fruit? I don't mean the odd exceptions of charity and individuals who just got on with loving, I mean the big picture that sets the church apart so that its known by love?

When we look at the present church, is the fruit really love? Or is it exclusivism, intolerance, dogma, and even now, there are those who have taken "love" and made it a doctrine to be argued and analyzed, manipulated and abused - yet again.

What if real love isn't afraid to confront the "bad fruit", just like Jesus did? What if its actually OK to splinter and tear apart the church because what we think is the church really isn't the church?
What if God actually wants christianity as it is currently displayed and lived, to completely implode, so that love can be free to rise up, unhindered?

I was blocked by an old Facebook friend because of my stance on issues such as hell, universalism and the inerrancy of the bible, all to the tune of "our fathers traditions and the 2000 year old traditions of the church are indisputably the basis for christianity". The absurdity of this statement is mind boggling, especially given his own departure from mainstream traditional beliefs, but for many christians, there is some arbitrary line that must not be crossed, although that line keeps moving!

So in my usual manner I've waffled all over the place, and need to return to the point -

Is it love to continually support a system of doctrines that bears little or no good fruit? Is it love to expose the glaring failings of that system, even if it means challenging the most sacred of its fundamental doctrines? Is love just niceness and tolerance, or is it challenging each other to live with integrity and keep pushing the limits of love without bigotry and traditions blinding us?
Was Jesus loving when he tore shreds off the Pharisees?


In many ways, the lines have been drawn, and although there will be fallout, the world will be a better and more loving place for it.

"Christianity" is dead - but God is very much alive, making sure it stops kicking!

Jim's Christmas Blog

I simply had to write a Christmas blog! Its been ages since my last one and, well, its just what you do.

So, where to begin. What a year!!

This mad journey never stops, and even in the crappy times there is a new hope and joy that is better than anything I could have imagined.

I've spent the last 3 years or so, sifting and sorting what I believed - taking many cautious steps back to shake free the paradigms (yes, my favourite word) of fundamentalist, traditional christianity. The last year in particular has seen a huge shift as I have refused to be locked in by dogma and traditional thought.

I have read and studied relentlessly, found the loose ends of traditional beliefs and pulled the threads to see exactly how much is revealed if we dare to simply keep unraveling.

At times its been scary, simply thinking I'm losing anything resembling faith and chucking the baby out with every drop of bathwater. But every time, the essence of faith and spirituality takes on a deeper and stronger meaning, a more powerful life, and a new view into the vistas of love, joy and peace.

The fruit of my journey is the only criteria that defines and directs my path. Is it love?! Does it bring peace and joy?! Does it bring love to everyone else around me?! Then I'm on the right track.

I've had to redefine even the very basics of things like:
Who is God?
Who is Jesus?
Do doctrines about things like the Trinity even matter?
Do the doctrines around Jesus divine purpose really matter?
Is christianity simply another religion based on ancient cultural myths?

These aren't light questions, and after spending over 40 years in the church, studying, reading, wrestling - looking at endless doctrines, looking at my heart and struggling to find integrity in every aspect of my life, I've dropped a LOT of stuff.

Spirituality is now far simpler and far more profound. Christianity is now just another religion, with many profound and deep truths, and many profoundly incongruous and stupid beliefs as well.

Who is Jesus? A good question. One I'm unwilling to comment on any more.

In unraveling christianity, I'm seeing how horribly self obsessed it can be - how disgustingly exclusive, condemning, judgmental and self righteous!

But in all the uncertainty there is now a freedom - to be wrong, to not know, to search and question, and not be afraid of the answers, even if they are simply more questions.

At the risk of sounding a bit arrogant, I've found integrity in who I am and my journey. I no longer care (mostly) about other people's opinions or beliefs and simply trust God, knowing that there is nothing I can do that would separate me from him/her, my journey and future is guaranteed, no longer defined by fear and dogma.

Am I still a christian? I don't know! And who cares? Its only a label we use to make sure people are "in or out".

I am me - I am!

My only choice is to "live loved"

Oh yeah, so, Christmas...

Its a hodge podge of religious festivals, mainly about Jesus, but who cares really, let's just celebrate life, family, unity, and LOVE. Simply enjoy the festivity and fun and don't get stressed!

A Classic Question.

Why would God limit something so important (the revelation of himself) to the pages of a book that depicts the history of one little tribe and their mythology about the origins of man and God?

And then further limit that single most important message for all mankind, to one guy from that tribe? 

Then, to add insult to injury, allow all the original documents recording these events to be lost, allow a bedraggled set of letters and disparate writings to be pulled together 300 years later, a collection that no one at the time agreed on anyway, and then the language that most of it was written in dies so no one really knows what half of it means anyway? 

1700 years later, no one is any the wiser and keeps fighting over what the collection of writings mean, and keeps continually fragmenting into more and more groups, cults, movements etc.

Meanwhile the rest of the world, the majority of the world, from way back when, has no idea all this is going on, or any idea that they have been left out of the most important revelation to all mankind. And the majority of the world still have no idea, because the keepers of this book are still busy arguing over it all, and billions of people, meanwhile, have missed out (and will continue to miss out) because God is stuck with this mess and isn't powerful enough or has his hands tied, or whatever, so he has no choice but to let most of mankind slope off to hell.

To make matters even more difficult, the keepers of the book have developed an extremely complex system of justifications as to why its the only source of everything God has spoken to mankind, using systems of very intricate circular reasoning, and then wrapping that reasoning in varying degrees of authoritarian control by presenting themselves as the ones who understand and can interpret it on our behalf.

Of course, because of all the endless divisions and arguments amongst the keepers, there are thousands and thousands of wise sages all dispensing conflicting understandings of the book with just as much authority and control, leaving the rest of us trying to decide who we should believe.

And that's just the tip of the iceberg.

Mind you, we do have a choice - we could take a step back and see if maybe there is a bigger picture?!

Spirituality vs Religion

I've been contemplating more and more on the nature of spirituality and how it relates to religion.

Often the terms are used interchangeably. Sometimes we use the word religion to refer to any denomination or cultural belief system. We hear people saying I'm a very religious person or others declaring they are spiritual but not religious.

I subscribe to the latter expression, but the impact of that statement has slowly been sinking in to the point where the differences are not only clear but extraordinary!

Here's what I have come to...

Spirituality is the concept of something outside of ourselves, greater than ourselves. Its the acknowledging of a greater mystery to the universe than what confronts our senses. Its often a realisation that we are part of a much larger "something", and are intimately united in some way, by forces we don't understand. More often than not, spirituality is regarded as an extension or expression of love, love being the only universal "thing" that enhances life, brings peace, joy and health.

The desire for peace with the spiritual is a universal "ache", however that may be pursued.

Religion is a whole different thing. Many scholars will give different meanings etc, and I'm aware that this is basically my opinions, but what the heck!

For me, religion is a system or codes, rules and rituals used to define spirituality. It takes a particular way of understanding, based on sociological and cultural paradigms, supported by subjective experience, and even factors like geography and genetics.

Religion is extremely subjective and can be anything from an individual's personal belief system to an authoritarian system that uses various methods of control to unite a large demographic of people.

That all sounds a bit clinical, but its not hard to understand. We all want to have a tidy set of rules and beliefs that are considered right, healthy and normal, that will ensure our health and safety and secure our eternal destiny. Mostly we want other people to sort it out for us so we don't have to think about the hard questions and we'll shift responsibility on to the "priests" (scholars, elders, leaders, philosophers, intelligentsia etc)

In the end, religion controls. It wraps up and defines a certain way of seeing spirituality. It puts it in a tidy box, has a set of written codes that govern thought and performance, and a prescribed "way" of achieving the "universal 'thing' that enhances life and brings peace, joy and health".
The problem with religion is its rampant and horrific ability to turn into dogma, usually expressed through exclusivity and the driving force of acceptance into a superior or higher level of spirituality than all others.

So what to do? We all have a system of "religion" that we use to internalise and express our spirituality (even atheists have a religious process to define their non-belief in spirituality, but that's another story).
Our systems are based on our own deeply complex paradigms, and more often than not, forced into an accepted religious structure (by choice, by birth or by threat).

Religion can be OK, absolutely fine - IF - we understand it for what it is. If we realise its an artificial system introduced to attempt to describe something that is inherently beyond our senses. Christianity is just a religion, like Islam, Hindu, all the others, all with their highly complex systems of beliefs.

The key factor is the "FRUIT" - what is the result of belief in that system? Does it bring life, peace, joy?
Is it love?
LOVE is the one factor that every human being that has ever existed craves. Its the one thing that unites us, the one thing at the core of our identity, of all we are.

If your religion gets in the way of that - if it attempts to control your core yearning for love - begin the unraveling. Start to ask hard questions. Be brave and admit to yourself there may be a problem. Strip away all that is not love. Don't be afraid of turning from a system that uses subtle (or blatant) ways of control through threats of curses and eternal damnation.

Live with spiritual integrity. Learn to see the real fruit of all religious systems.

What am I?

Sick of labels! Thats what I am!

Sick of having to define myself by a specific belief system - by doctrines, theology, denomination or even a religion.

When I first encountered God, it was outside of any religious structure. It was pure and life giving, with no regard to anything religious. It wasn't even Jesus. It was simply an overwhelming revelation of love and acceptance by God.

The next 40 plus years were spent trying to categorise and analyse that experience, under the guidance and influence of "the church", simply because the closest thing to anything spiritual I could hang this experience on to was the local Anglican church where I played the organ (I was a classical organist in my youth, but that's a whole other story).

It was a journey of shaping and defining that experience, turning it into something tidy and quantifiable. I jumped through every hoop that was put in front of me, but I never found what I was looking for. Nothing ever fit the original encounter.

So here I am, having now spent years unravelling that journey and discovering how useless and irrelevant all that classifying and labelling was - realising how much damage I suffered by trying to adapt to a system of belief that was at complete odds with my core identity in every respect. I'm not talking about sexuality (although that is a whole other story as well) but my identity as a spiritual being. I discovered that a deep cognitive dissonance had eaten away at my whole identity to the point where I had no integrity. I acted out the christian life as prescribed by traditions based on the subjective interpretations of an ancient book.

But my heart knew better. It always has.

It knew about unconditional love. It knew about freedom and peace, joy and compassion. It knew who God is all the time and quietly refused to be manipulated, abused, insulted, humiliated and labeled into a neat conformed package.

So I can now finally feel free to drop the label "christian". Its no longer something I feel comfortable with. Its a label that doesn't describe me in the slightest. In fact, the image associated with that label is basically repulsive to me, although I have tried to maintain an attachment to the label for the sake of maintaining relationships.

So what do I believe?

It changes and grows. There are many core concepts that I find christianity has a wonderful grasp of. But there are many other christian beliefs that simply defy the very nature of the universe, humanity and God himself. I'm not even going to bother listing those things because you will only want to define me by them anyway. And I will continue to do the same to you, although its becoming much easier to look past those beliefs and paradigms to see the human inside, the love inside, God inside.

I have returned to the place God revealed himself to me, and started rebuilding without "christianity". Make of it what you will, call me backslidden or a heretic. But one thing I do have is integrity. I also have a greater sense of love than I've ever known. I no longer get suicidal depression, and genuinely feel a greater love for people.

So there you have it. I'm Jim - not a christian, not a buddhist, not a calvinist or arminian, not Hare Krishna or  new age, or any other age. I'm just Jim on an awesome journey of spiritual discovery.

Searching for Normality

I really don't want this to sound self indulgent, arrogant or patronising in any way, so excuse me if it comes across that way...

I've been thinking a lot about the way we all see things. About how we so easily put ourselves at the centre to the point where we refuse to accept that all we understand could be such a tiny distorted fragment of the truth. We love to find a simple place where we can reshape the universe around us. A place that is comfortable and non-challenging. And then we build up defences to protect that place and end up shooting anyone who comes near. We peer out over the parapets with binoculars that are so encrusted with dust and dirt that all we can see are vague threatening forms as they move closer. We grab our justifications (bibles, favourite teachers, holy books...) and hurl them at the advancing enemies.

Some of us "get it" and others don't.
Some of us seem to see a bigger picture, a much bigger picture.
Some of us can't be complacent with our thoughts and assumptions
Some of us see the ever spiraling complexities of life
Some of us struggle to find coherent integrity of mind, emotion and spirit
Some of us can't stand to live the status quo
Some of us are aware of the deceptions of paradigms and biases
Some of us cannot switch off logic and reason
Some of us cannot stop unraveling things until we find what's at the centre
Some of us realise we may never find what we are looking for
Some of us crave for a higher and deeper and wider understanding of all things
Some of us catch glimpses of the interrelatedness of everything
Some of us lack the expression for our flashes of insight, where every word falls so far short
Some of us see things so differently we wonder why we are here at all
Some of us see love where no one else does
Some of us have hearts that ache from the injustice and pain around us
Some of us give up in frustration
Some of us escape into other places

Why do some people think they've cornered the market on truth
Why do some people fail to recognise that opinions are just that
Why are some people happy in their racism, bigotry and narcissism
Why are so many not even open to growth; spiritually, emotionally or intellectually

So what do those who see the brightness of a bigger world, the security of unconditional love, the joy in the unity of all things and the freedom of life do, in the face of dogma, religion, legalism, close mindedness...

And not just in the church, but all societies, great and small.

Are some of us gifted or cursed? relevant or irrelevant? deceived by pride or humbled by grief?

I don't know, and I hate even thinking about it. some of us would just love to be able to live "normal" lives - whatever that is!

A Quick Look Over My Shoulder

It's been a while since my last blog,  mainly because I've been dealing with two family deaths, and sitting back a little to gather my thoughts.

I've also just been watching, reading, generally getting a feel for what's happening in the Christian/spiritual world.

I stopped today to "look back over my shoulder" and nearly turned onto a pillar of salt!

I have come so far on my journey that when I saw the hidiousness of bible believing fundamentalism, that I spent the best part of my life trying to embrace,  I actually felt sick!

I feel so sad and angry and frustrated that so many still live on that tiny little strangled world of self righteousness, completely ripped off by a religious system. And they actually want that! They want a tidy safe system that provides a list of rules and priciples to live by.

Any way, if you have followed many of my blogs you would be familiar with what I think these days!  God has never been more real, I have never experienced greater love and never felt more free!

Suffice to say, I was shocked at how repulsive it has become to me. And yet, my compassion for those locked in it has grown and it almost feels like my heart is  physically hurting for them.

"Oh you foolish Galatians..."

So, I can't go back, and when I looked even further back over my shoulder, I realized I've always been the one to question the status quo. Guess I have a rebellious spirit, despite all that prayer counseling and deliverance.

Life IN God, God IN me! So simple, so pure, living loved.