Happy Easter!

You didn't really expect a traditional Easter greeting from me did you?

Many of you are used to my "attacks" on Christianity, and I often post stuff explaining my reasons, but my "audience" has slowly shifted, friends have come and gone (although I still manage to keep quite a few traditional christians in my friends list).

So why do I keep digging away at the christian faith?
Why can't I just get on with life and leave people to believe whatever they want?

Glad you asked!!

Basically, everyone is free to believe whatever they want. Why shouldn't we? Our personal beliefs are our business. Of course, the one defining condition is how do those beliefs affect others, and how do they really affect us?

There are countless types of religious and spiritual belief systems, Christianity being one of the major players. But even the major ones have endless official and unofficial variations, often at complete loggerheads with each other - to the point of hatred, war and even genocide.

What does this tell us?

People spend their entire lives justifying their beliefs in an effort to claim they have the truth. There are a lot of psychological reasons why this happens, but whatever the reasons, humans love to be right about whatever they believe. We love to feel special and better than others.

All this clearly tells us that there is no "one truth" - no one true religion. No one is "right".

When we have the guts to step back from our beliefs and see how all religions and beliefs are nothing more than subjective opinions we can see them for what they are - the damage they can do - the good they can do - and how irrelevant they are in the end.

I will continue to dismantle traditional Christianity. Not because I have an axe to grind, but because the only way forward for humanity is to grow out of our need for this type of religion, to grow up as it were, into being creatures responsible for each other and our own lives. Religions by their very nature, create division, separate humanity into "us and them".

I'm not attacking people, just challenging what they believe and why, with the hope that we can all move past the need for this type of religion and grow into understanding reality, love and life together.

Happy Easter!!

The Psychological Legacy

If you've read my book "It's Life Jim..." you'll be familiar with how my mental state was affected by my life of battling sexuality with religion and the constant fight with depression and suicide ideation.

When my wife died it all came to a head and I had a "meltdown" or whatever you want to call it. The symptoms were a relentless combination of heavy depression (like walking around covered in a wet dark blanket, unable to think beyond the pain and confusion that keeps pounding your head), Intense anxiety attacks (that created a physical gnawing in the gut, confusion, a strange disassociation from my environment and a feeling that I was about to burst into tears), and an escalation of ADHD symptoms (lack of focus, restlessness, confusion, thought's racing etc).  The suicide ideation thankfully went!

This lead to counselling and medication and living on the benefit. There was no way I could hold down a job!

Nearly six years later I'm doing pretty good, but there's the legacy that I just have to live with despite my best efforts. All of these symptoms are still around. Yes, I get days where the depression hits (although nothing like it was) and I still get anxiety attacks, and the ADHD symptoms are the bane of my life.

I've learnt the triggers (mostly) and how to handle it all. I can sense better when I might take a nosedive, and I know how to "roll" with it and not be fearful.

But it's still there. This is the legacy of a life ruled by religious control, cognitive dissonance, self loathing and emotional abuse. Will it ever go away? I'd like to think so, but I'm not holding my breath.

It's like this for countless others. We are presumed to be over it and "all better now". Sure, we've moved on and even enjoy life in ways we never dreamed of. My life is fantastic and fulfilling. But the legacy quietly lives on, reminding us daily.

Be gentle with yourself.
Learn your weaknesses and accept them.
Roll with them, don't fight them.
Find the best way through it - socialise or retreat - talk to people or hide in your cave... there's no right or wrong, just whatever enables you to move through it safely.
Get help if needed, any time, don't be a martyr.

Life is good, no matter what the past has done to us. Life is rich and full of wonder and love.
Live it!!